Out of all the parts of speech, I think verbs are the coolest. I’m not sure that I’d say verbs can make or break your manuscript, but they definitely have a big influence on your readers’ enjoyment.
As a fiction author, you’ll want to give the verbs in your manuscript a lot of attention. The right verbs in the correct tense and form give power to your sentences. And the not-so-great verbs used incorrectly undermine your writing.
Most of your verbs should be strong and specific
Using strong and specific verbs as often as possible fuels your writing.
What’s wrong with went, threw, touched, looked, ate, put, and took?
- They’re boring. They don’t bring any oomph to your story. When you use stronger verbs, your writing will be more exciting to read.
- They’re general. They don’t give the reader a lot of information about the action. How did your character throw the book at her friend? Did she toss it or did she launch it? When you use more specific verbs, your characters’ actions will come to life in the reader’s imagination.
- They tend to be overused. Because they’re so general, these verbs can be used in many sentences and often are, to the detriment of the writing.*
Consider the following (silly) example:
The boy walked happily into the store and picked up a carton of milk from the dairy section. As he quickly walked to the cashier, the boy stepped on a banana peel. The carton broke when it hit the floor, and milk got all over aisle 7, causing the teen who had been cleaning the floors all morning to cry.
Paying attention to adverbs and verbs, I made the following revisions:
The boy skipped into the store and grabbed a carton of milk from the dairy section. As he raced to the cashier, the boy slipped on a banana peel. The carton split open when it hit the floor, and milk splashed all over aisle 7, causing the teen who had been mopping the floors all morning to burst into tears.
What’s different about the verbs in the first example from the verbs in the second example? Let’s compare them:
walked happily —> skipped
I found a stronger verb to replace the weak verb + adverb combination.
picked up —> grabbed
My new verb more precisely conveys what I wanted my readers to envision as they read my story.
quickly walked —> raced
Here’s another example of finding a verb that easily does the job of my original adverb + common verb.
stepped —> slipped
Isn’t slipped more exciting? It doesn’t mean quite the same thing, but I chose it with intention, and I think it has more oomph.
broke —> split open
Here I replaced one word with two, but the result is easier for my readers to visualize.
got all over —> splashed
This verb is way more fun than the phrase got all over.
cleaning —> mopping
I found a more specific verb.
cry —> burst into tears
Did he cry silently? Did just one tear fall down his cheek? No! It was sudden and possibly loud.
Do you see how by minding my verbs and making a few replacements, I gave my story a mini-makeover?
Take a close look at your verbs as you self-edit. Are they common and general? Do you use a lot of -ly adverbs to support your weak verbs? Do you use the same few verbs over and over?
Choosing verbs in stories with a deep point of view
If you’re writing in first-person POV or close third-person POV, you’ll want to choose verbs that your point-of-view character would use.
For example, if your POV character is an artist, they may use art-related verbs even in a situation unrelated to art.
I looked up. A bright double rainbow painted the sky with color.
Choosing your verbs in this way will help to further limit that distance between the reader and the POV character, which is the goal of deep point of view.
*Verb repetition is not an issue when it comes to dialogue tags. Your dialogue should stand out, not your dialogue tags—those can be boring. Please see my January 2022 post on dialogue tags for more information.
Each verb’s tense should fit in with its surroundings
A verb in the wrong tense can throw a reader out of your story.
Margaret strained to get a glimpse of the lead singer as he step down from the stage and headed toward the bar. Too many people stood in front of her, so she attempt to push her way forward.
Did you notice the two verbs in the incorrect tense? They most likely threw you off and made you go back and reread—not something you want a reader to do while reading your book!
The corrected version should read smoothly for you:
Margaret strained to get a glimpse of the lead singer as he stepped down from the stage and headed toward the bar. Too many people stood in front of her, so she attempted to push her way forward.
What is the correct tense for a verb? It depends. In which narrative tense have you chosen to write your story? If you’re writing in the past tense, most of your verbs will be in the past tense. If you’re telling your story in the present tense, most of your verbs will be in the present tense.
Past: I unlocked the door and stepped into the dark house. (correct)
Present: I unlock the door and step into the dark house. (correct)
I unlock the door and stepped into the dark house. (incorrect)
Not every verb will be in the same tense. Verb-tense consistency is important, but there are always exceptions. No matter which tense you use, another tense may be necessary in certain sentences. See the two examples below.
From a story written in the past tense:
“I will stop by tomorrow,” he said. “I promise.”
She grabbed his shoulders. “Please don’t forget. I need those papers.”
From a story written in the present tense:
She often thinks about him, about their trip to Japan two years ago. Had he been unsure about their relationship even then? If she sees him at the gallery tonight, what will she say?
Verb form matters too. In addition to choosing the correct verb tense (past, present, or future), you’ll want to make sure you’ve chosen the right verb form (simple, progressive, perfect, or perfect progressive) for each of your verbs.
Verb form: Simple
Past: I listened to my favorite song three times today.
Present: I listen to my favorite song every day.
Future: I will listen to my favorite song every day.
Verb form: Progressive
Past: I was listening to my favorite song when my sister walked in.
Present: I am listening to my favorite song when my sister walks in.
Future: I will be listening to my favorite song all day.
Verb form: Perfect
Past: I had listened to my favorite song three times that day.
Present: I have listened to my favorite song three times today.
Future: I will have listened to my favorite song three times by tonight.
Verb form: Perfect Progressive
Past: I had been listening to my favorite song all afternoon.
Present: I have been listening to my favorite song all afternoon.
Future: I will have been listening to my favorite song for 45 minutes when it’s time to go.
Overuse of the progressive
I’d like to narrow in on something I see when editing manuscripts—overuse of the progressive verb form.
At times, the progressive verb form can be useful and even necessary for clear writing. But often I see it used when the simple verb form would work just fine.
An example:
Nica was sitting at her desk, working on the manuscript she had promised to send to her editor by noon. The clock was ticking. She was thinking about the best way to rework chapter 11 when her phone buzzed with a new text. Her brother—again. He was needing a ride to work. She sighed.
Here’s how I would edit the above:
Nica sat at her desk, working on the manuscript she had promised to send to her editor by noon. The clock was ticking. She was thinking about the best way to rework chapter 11 when her phone buzzed with a new text. Her brother—again. He needed a ride to work. She sighed.
As you can see, I didn’t change everything to simple past. Let’s compare the verb forms:
was sitting —> sat
I revised to simple past because it’s clear in this sentence that Nica is currently sitting at her desk.
was ticking —> was ticking
I could have revised to ticked, but I like the feeling of urgency that was ticking provides.
was thinking —> was thinking
The progressive verb form is helpful here to show that Nica’s phone buzzed while she was thinking.
was needing —> needed
The progressive verb form is unhelpful (and feels wordy) here.
The simple verb form should be your default. Use the progressive verb form deliberately, when it helps you more clearly convey what’s happening in the scene.
Verbs in flashbacks
The first few verbs in a flashback should be in the perfect and perfect progressive forms. You can move to the simple and progressive forms for the main chunk of your flashback, then return to the perfect and perfect progressive forms during the last sentence or two.
Sound complicated? It’s not. Here’s an example:
Henry had just bought his first car. It had taken him two years to save enough to buy the old red pickup truck from his neighbor. He washed the truck lovingly, wiped down its interior, and drove his friends around town that night. They were adults! That was the first night he had talked to Chelsea. She’d been impressed.
I start out the flashback with had bought and had taken. This lets the reader know a flashback has begun.
Then I move to simple past with washed, wiped, drove, were, and was.
Toward the end of the flashback, I return to perfect past with had talked and had been, signaling to the reader that we are returning to the main storyline.
Why write flashbacks in this way? Too many perfect verbs (too many had _____ verbs) can be grating to the reader’s ear.
Feeling overwhelmed?
Just as I advised with focusing on grammar rules, don’t get caught up on finding the perfect verbs as you write your first draft, when you’re just trying to get your story out onto paper (or Word doc). Minding your verbs is most likely something you’ll do in the self-editing phase.
If you hire a line editor, they will also be minding your verbs. Many copyeditors will point out weak verbs and maybe even make suggestions for stronger ones. I know I do!
